Dear Karezza friends,
My partner and I are continuing to experiment with Karezza. My experience thus far has been to feel almost invariably more tired after Karezza than before I began. I attributed this to there being too much sexual excitement (fire) too much of the time in spite of our intention to practice Karezza.
Now we have been doing much "better" from the point of view of excitement. Most of our encounter is simply beautiful, with very warm, tender feelings, and moments of "excitement" are the exception - rather than moments of fire, it is more like continuous glowing embers. Recently, I have been "glowing embers" the whole time and never "fire"; at times she is "fire", somewhat strongly so for a time, then we slow down until this fire has gone down to an ember again. So from this point of view, it seems to me we are practicing Karezza "rightly" - since from what I have read, it is normal for "fire" to flame up at times, involuntarily, at which point both lovers simply slow down, take deep breaths, etc., until the excitement has gone down and the energy becomes more gentle again.
I have an erection the whole time. (But the feeling of awoken sexual energy is very gentle, if continuous and strong). I use a condom. After insertion, we do very little motion, remaining still for most of the time, and continuing to caress, cuddle, touch, and kiss throughout.
So while at the beginning of our "attempts" it seemed to me that we were doing things very imperfectly, I now feel this is no longer the case.
The experience is really beautiful and deeply loving and tender.
But what utterly puzzles me is that I feel tired and drained afterward. Not tired and drained like after an ejaculation, which feels disastrous for my body, mind, and emotions for a long time after. So not comparable to an ejaculation, but still very clearly and noticeably tired and drained. Before our last encounter, I was feeling very good energetically; after this very beautiful encounter, I feel drained, sapped of vitality. And I am more irritable. In addition, where there was a palpable loving energy between us during the day before the sexual encounter, this loving energy is hardly noticeable afterward, maybe simply due to my feeling drained.
My partner feels OK. She said after the last time that she felt refreshed afterward.
This is very strange and upsetting to me because from everything I have read about Karezza, Karezza, in contrast to ordinary sex, REGENERATES, REJUVENATES, ENERGIZES, and HEALS.
For me, the opposite has invariably been happening.
I am pretty sensitive to energy: my own energetic state and the energy between us. I have been noticing that I start feeling a draining of energy after insertion (penetration), during the time I am inside her. As I mentioned, most of the time we are simply still in this area, with very little, only occasional motion.
I understand that during the sexual encounter, the man is essentially in a giving role and the woman in a receiving role.
But from everything I have read, Karezza is supposed to be wonderfully energizing for both partners.
As I mentioned, this is very upsetting to me.
What is happening? Has anyone else had this experience? Could we be doing something wrong?
I would be really grateful for any help.