Healing her hair

Submitted by daventryHero on
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Lately my mom's been struggling with trying to stop using shampoo, dyes, and other products in her hair which she thinks have been responsible for damaging it a lot over the years. I think it is especially tough for her because right now her hair does not meet typical standards of beauty and when she was my age a very large portion of her sense of self-worth was tied up in her physical appearance.

I have found it useful to stroke her hair and head and smile at her when she is having a rough time with it. Even though she doesn't necessarily "like it" in the moment (the first time she said "ewww, oily" and took my hand and tried to wipe it on my pants), I think it helps.

Trying to get rid of so many years of societal programming related to hair and appearance must be tough. Being a dude it's not something I have experienced directly, but I can empathize.


Is she trying to fix her hair

Is she trying to fix her hair? I don't believe Shampoo can permanantly damage your hair since it's always growing...dying may if it's excessive but I doubt it. If she doesn't want to add any products (Paul mitchells tea tree oil moisturized right before blowdrying can do a wonders to my sort of wiry hair), she could start taking certain vitamins (just google search it)

If she's not interested in "healing," then you're probably doing the right thing. Good luck to you all.

Two observations

I think it is really nice you care for your mom this way.

And second, I never shampoo my hair. It doesn't look greasy either. I don't wash it anymore except maybe every month or two. A lot of what people believe is not true. One myth is you have to wash your hair. You really don't. After a week or two your skin adjusts and your hair doesn't get greasy. It's amazing.

I too have been really happy

I too have been really happy with how my hair has turned out since I stopped shampooing.

I took it a step farther and also no longer shower except maybe a few times a year. A bit more extreme, but I enjoy it :)

What's the process your skin

What's the process your skin went through went not showering? I have a family member that can go quite a while without showering. This person still cat bathes and at some point, especially in the summer, feels the need to shower.

I've never been a must shower every day person. I've been showering more lately due to exercise and I feel the need to shower more. Maybe I should try not showering and see what happens.


Actually, now that you

Actually, now that you mention it, I have noticed that when I do shower now it's almost like there's a thick layer of buildup all over which can be removed if I try hard enough. It takes a lot of effort, though.

It starts to break up into little chunks if I scrub really hard with a washcloth. Like pencil eraser shavings. During a rare shower I remember thinking I was done after scrubbing quite a lot and then realizing there was still some of this stuff left on me and I went back to scrub really thoroughly to get it all off.

I have heard a reference to the "horny layer" which may be related to this, but I'm not sure.

Other than that the skin is fine and I wouldn't consider it either "dry" or "oily".

Thanks for the article. I agree with the point she made that the armpits, groin, and feet are the major odor producing areas. I may try cleaning just those more often when I need to attend some social function where smell could offend someone.

I have heard from other sources that washing away the body's natural oils too often can cause it to waste a lot of energy trying to regenerate them, but I don't know if that's true or how exactly people have come to that conclusion. Maybe it's just personal observation.

My guess is soaking in a bath

My guess is soaking in a bath might help dissolve the dead skin buildup. It also could be that one needs more than one washing during the same shower with soap or by rubbing. Maybe a luffa would help. Are you just rubbing without soap? Can you feel this layer on your skin or only see it when it rubs off?

Do you or others find you stink? Have you noticed any attraction differences due to pheromones?

I think my skin would get itchy eventually...somewhere around 10 days or so. Maybe that's in my head. I've not tried going a long time while also maintaining hygiene of the odor producing parts. Caveman probably just swam when he could. What did the Vikings do in winter? What do monks do?

Thanks for the bath

Thanks for the bath suggestion. I'd really like to take one, although recently I've become more suspicious of our water (pretty nasty city water) and looking for ways to clean it up before I soak in it. We have some filters but they are only really for a drinking water quantity, not a whole bath.

I only really noticed the buildup when it was coming off and making the pencil eraser shavings. I haven't tried scrubbing it without soap (yet). The skin feels "clean" afterwards, but also like it's missing something. I'm not sure I like it. I also noticed after my mom washed her face today that her skin looked dry and "off". Less glow. Not something I've paid much attention to before.

The odor is noticeable. I love my stink (heh). Nobody has commented on it but like I say I don't get out much.

I don't interact with women that much so I can't comment on pheromones or attraction either.

The only think I know about monks washing is that some of them in the Zen Buddhist school go outside and poor freezing water on themselves in the wintertime for 100 days in a row. Probably not for cleanliness. Personally, I am not ready for this level of commitment Wink


Washing the major odor producing areas can make things worse unless you understand this simple fact: armpit odor is caused by bacteria feeding on sweat. The sweat itself has no smell and it's slightly acidic to keep bacteria growth in check. If you use soap on your armpits you'll create an alkaline environment where bacteria will thrive. Not only that but the soap residues will provide food for the bacteria. I read somewhere that you should never use soap on your armpits, or if you do you should make sure to restore the acidic pH of the skin by using some vinegar for example.

Also, don't scrub your skin too much, it has a protective layer called the acid mantle which protects you from all kinds of viruses and bacteria including e coli. Soap also neutralizes the acid mantle for a few hours until the body can restore it.

Thanks very much for this. I

Thanks very much for this. I guess the only reason I was thinking occasional washing might be necessary is to remove odor before I need to go into a bank or something where my odor could bother others.

Of course I'd prefer not to mess up my own body chemistry in the process.

Maybe the best approach is to simply make sure the clothes are clean and smell-free before going out, but to avoid washing the body and messing it up.

If you have any other thoughts I'd appreciate them very much.

Too smelly for a bank? They

Too smelly for a bank? They'll take money from anyone. Actual money laundering is a business in some parts of the world that have sweaty and otherwise filthy notes. Compared to these notes just about everyone is clean.

I think it would be cool if the public would tell me I stink. Usually strangers won't say anything even when there's a rather stinky homeless person.

I made an experiment where I

I made an experiment where I put clean clothes every day but never showered for about a month. Nobody can tell. Bodies don't progressively degrade if not washed. Why would humans repel their peers with their natural smell if they don't shower daily? That doesn't make any evolutionary sense. You'll smell like you. Which usually means an almost neutral smell. I find that much more attractive than the smell of shampoo, we read a lot from a person's natural smell.

Clothes do smell if left with sweat on. That's why it's hard to understand how could one not shower every day, because everyone knows some guy or another or the homeless guy at the corner who smells because "they don't wash". That is not true: they smell because they don't wash their clothes often enough.

I do water only showers, like this guy:

You may also still need deodorant, the armpits were the only part that sometimes smelled, but it varied with diet (sugar made me a stink bomb without deodorant).

Neat. Thanks for sharing this

Neat. Thanks for sharing this experiment as it certainly makes me more confident about continuing. I agree it doesn't make evolutionary sense.

I do remember occasionally running into a guy in high school or college who always stank, day after day. I assumed it was 'cause they never showered, but it's possible they were just wearing unwashed clothes every day.

I dig the potential for pheromones to shine thru when you don't shower. I haven't had many sexual relationships in my life but the thing I'll always remember from one particular teenage relationship was the way her smell affected me. She had a really messy house and didn't shower as much as other girls I had dated. So I think a lot more of her natural scent was coming through than other girls (I think a lot of the other girls actually made a point of showering right before they saw me each time. What a waste!)

Anyway, this girl didn't smell "good" like a perfume or something but (especially early on in the relationship) smelling her was like inhaling a drug. Definitely triggered something in my brain. It was amazing.

On the flip side, another girl I dated didn't wash her feet properly and the smell was so disgusting I had to get her to do something about it. Not good at all. Or, maybe she did wash her feet normally and just hadn't done it recently so bad bacteria were eating the soap residue as goosewort was mentioning.

Sorry if this topic is a little weird or offensive, but I know of no other site where I can talk about this stuff with such an open-minded crowd. Thanks for being tolerant :)

Could one make a face wash

Could one make a face wash that is more acidic...perhaps water and vinegar or lemon juice just as with no poo hair concoctions? I guess one could even put in some soap and maintain a pH that is acidic to neutral.