How to keep libido up after reboot?

Submitted by enigma2k on
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I have just finished my reboot after 65 days and have a raging libido and really feel like back at age 15. This is just an amazing feeling - it feels as if I am really alive again.

During the reboot I've felt really depressed because my libido was completely gone as I absolutely did nothing sexually. And the fear I am facing now is that my libido will vanish again if I refrain from anything that's sexual. (I am currently without a partner)

I get it that I should not watch porn anymore (I don't even have any desire for it anymore) but what's about masturbation with just focusing on the sensations without any fantasizing? I just don't want to tell my brain to start a second reboot and turn my libido off again...

you could forgo masturbation possibly

or infrequently engage in it, like on a schedule, every 14 days. And without fantasy, just sensation.

The less frequently you masturbate to orgasm, the more pent up sexual energy you will have and you can focus onto your life, not just sexually but in your work and everything else.

And your libido will always be high that way, at least most of the time.

I agree. I went through a

I agree. I went through a successful 80 - 90 day reboot and started adding M back into my routine. I started out once every two weeks, which was working fine until it gradually escalated to M evey day and O about 4 times a week. This resulted in a recent case of dead-dick which I am currently recovering from. I have concluded that masturbation is simply unnessecary and is only acceptable if you can do it WITHOUT FANTASY or at least with minimal fantasy. I say save your sex for a woman. I think one of the false assumptions that we all have about sex is that it is like a muscle - the more you work it the bigger it gets. This is obviously far from the truth. Less is more. The less frequent stimulation you have, the more sensitive you will become as I'm sure you have discovered in the reboot. Anyhow, this has been my experience having rebooted successfully and having experimented with reintroducing M back into the routine. Honestly, I wouldn't reccomend it - your morning and spontaneous erections will keep your tissues stretched out, thus maintaining your size. When you start having sex again, I would bet that your body will adapt to whatever ejaculation frequency that is appropriate.

Sorry, I have forgotten to

Sorry, I have forgotten to add that the masturbation without any fantasizing is also without orgasm as goal (so absolutely without orgasm, just feeling the sensations while masturbating and touching your body)

This is actually a concept I have read in the book "No More Mr Nice Guy" where he absolutely agrees with what this sites teaches, that you should absolutely refrain from porn and fantasizing but should include healthy masturbation (masturbation with just focusing on sensations and without orgasm as goal). This helps your brain to rewire to what sex actually is about: the present moment and sensations

but what is your experience

but what is your experience regarding this? I'd like to do it right from the beginning.

As I understand it, as it is teached on your site, is that if your are without a partner you should completely refrain from porn, orgasm and masturbation even it is only about sensations - so you should behave the same as if you were rebooting. Is this correct?

After 60 days in my reboot I haven't felt much libido and was a bit depressed. Only after I have begun masturbation without any porn, fantasy and just concentrating on the sensations (and of course without orgasm), I have felt high libido, high energy and absolutely great. I haven't felt this great in a long time because I was just so pumped up with positive high energy. It's just amazing. This went on for some days till I stopped masturbation again. Now I am feeling much lower energy and libido again.

So what is the best way to manage being single? I, for myself, love having high libido and energy but don't know if "healthy masturbation" does cause me to relapse.

I wish there were clearer answers

Orgasm often has a bit of a "chaser," which can also be a bit deceptive in that it can make you feel like you need more and more orgasm to feel okay. Ultimately, however, finding the balance that works for you is what really counts.

All I can say is that it pays to experiment until you find what works for you. Also, if you find your masturbation schedule is escalating to keep you feeling good...then it's not your true libido driving you. It's probably the cycle of lows and highs. You are probably self-medicating the lows with the neurochemical buzz of orgasm. The spiral can eventually leave you feeling less than your best.

For more:

The Passion Cycle