I have been feeling a great deal of fear in my relationship, and ever since I started reading about karezza,and other related topics, my fear has intensified. There are some things that have risen to the surface in my relationship, and these things involve my boyfriend's sexual habits. We are a somewhat new couple, and things are easy and it feels like a deep unshakable love. But I feel that he is insatiable and I feel like there is an underlying "disconnect" between us that involves sex. I have been reading numerous articles on "your brain on porn", "reuniting", and "cupids poisoned arrow", and it caused so much angst. I say this because I want to cultivate something deep and satisfying with my partner, but I fear that I will end up facing a wall I can't climb. I just feel/fear that my partner needs his Os, needs his porn, and I'm basing this on very telling experiences. For instance, we had sex the other night, I fell asleep, and not even half an hour later he goes to the bathroom to get himself off again. I wake up in the middle of this affair. He finally comes back I make a fuss because...I am not even sure why actually, and then we have sex again. And he gets off again. But this isn't the only time this has happened, and it makes me feel weird. And maybe that is more my issue than his, but it really makes it difficult for me to envision having a conversation about bonding in a different way and limiting Os to strengthen that bond. We are very much a couple that cuddles and we regularly engage in bonding behaviors,but as I said there is a feeling of disconnection at times. My partner has a great deal of issues. He is an insomniac, unmotivated, suffers from depression-until me, but it's still there, and so forth. And now I wondering if this is because of masturbation addiction or what. I feel like I'm going everywhere with this, the point is that I want him, and want us to be strong and connected in a deeper way. I want to go beyond orgasms, how do I tell him that? How do I see it for myself? I wrote inner resistance as the topic starter because I feel it within myself too. I guess I am feeling dissonance about whether this "karezza" can be the answer to harmony and togetherness in a long term relationship.