Lets quit masturbation (3 months challenge)

Submitted by kgestapo on
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Hello guys, I am a 22 years old guy from India,
Here is my sad story:
I have been masturbating since I was 13, I discovered it accidently, it was pleasurable, so I started masturbating daily, that time I didn't had internet so no porn, I used to masturbate by watching movies, magazines etc.,

when I was 17 I felt that I am getting weak, my erections were not hard anymore, even my ejaculate was clear by now, I was in high school that time, luckily I met a girl & fell in love with her, she also loved me, we met daily, those were the greatest days of my life, during this period I rarely masturbated, (even we both never tried to have sex, so no orgasm), this continued for almost a year & I was feeling good that I gave up masturbation,

But soon after passing high school I got my first smartphone with internet connection,
Very soon I started watching porn, I started masturbating daily again, I stopped meeting my gf because I was busy in watching porn, she always waited for me, but I never came,

Then one day without informing her I moved to another city for college, I got a room on rent in the new city, After college hours I usually browsed porn sites & found a new technique of masturbation "Edging", I started masturbating without orgasms because I was getting weak again,

But edging didn't felt good, then I started masturbating multiple times a day, it continued...

I was 20 years old by now, I used to be very social but now I became very lonely, I used to spend much time watching porn, on holidays I stroked my penis whole day before orgasm, but during this time I started noticing that I looked like a 15 year old guy in my class, I was the only one who was very weak, I had no facial hairs, I was horrified that its due to masturbation, I looked up on internet and found that masturbation is normal it doesn't harms, I tried to change my diet but no success, I still looked like a boy, I got into depression every time I masturbated, my performance in college was dropped, I found it difficult to concentrate on studies,

Then I planned to quit this bad habit, I was successful for abstaining about a month in starting but after that I again started masturbating but this time only once a week this continued for a year, soon I was able to reduce it to 1-2 times a month,
By now I felt some improvements, my erections were harder now, I also reduced watching porn,

During all this I started to get attracted towards ladies [mostly matures) living near my house, I started to fantasize about them although my masturbation frequency was not increased, but I started masturbating 5-6 times a day once or twice in a month,

And till now its continuing I am unable to quit this habbit,

And yesterday night I masturbated but only once,

Now I don't want to masturbate, I found this forum 2 days ago, and I was very much inspired by many guys here,

I have decided not to masturbate again,
I already lost so much,
I lost my love, I lost concentration in everything.

I am a living dead body, but now I will live my life.

I will abstain from masturbation for 3 months, guys I need some suggestions...

Help me please.

Also I would like to mention

Also I would like to mention that I have normal erection, and when I abstain for a week I get very hard morning erections, also I get erections whenever I see a hot girl...
Is all that normal?

Because of these morning erections I am unable to quit, whenever I get erection nude girls start flashing in my mind.

I am also finding it difficult to concentrate in studies...

Welcome

I'd recommend that you repost on one of these forums. They have even more men with experience in recovering.

YOURBRAINREBALANCED.COM

REDDIT.NoFap

Strong erections are a sign of health. Maybe you just need a new girlfriend. That can help with feelings of balance, as affection and close, trusted companionship are very soothing. What about contacting the girl you abandoned and trying again? If you explain what you have learned, she might be willing to start again.

One way to cope with fantasies is to meditate regularly, as it makes it easier to control your thoughts. Meditation ideas here: Meditation

And you might also experiment with one of these energy circulation techniques when you feel horny: Energy Circulation Practices

The worst is already behind you. Time to reach out to women for some friendly interaction.

Thanks Marina for the useful

Thanks Marina for the useful links, you guys are doing great job,

I meditate every night by using binaural beats and some Hindu mantras, but not regularly due to too much porn, but now I will be regular,
I myself experienced that meditation heals also binaural beats really help a lot, I have lot of binaural beats, If you allow me to post binaural beats here I can post here too, it will be very helpful to others too.

And if we talk about my

And if we talk about my girlfriend, its impossible to find her now, I don't have her contact. She changed mobile no. Many times I looked for her on facebook but till now no luck. Actually our parents were in Army, so we lived for only 3 years at a place, I don't know where she is now. :(

Today is the third day, I

Today is the third day, I already started meditating, limited my internet usage, started doing some exercises,

Today in the morning hours during sleep I had a dream about having sex with a girl, but somehow I woke up and saved myself from a wet dream. It was 3 am, Again when I woke up at 6 am I found my penis was tight, I immediately started chanting a mantra...

Any other way to escape when you feel horny? Specially when you are outside.

Update: Today is the sixth

Update: Today is the sixth day, And I think testosterone levels are very high now because I struggled whole day today, I was all alone in my room and I felt very strong urges to watch porn, I was saying to myself that I will only watch and no masturbation (this always happens with me and I end up in edging and finally ejaculation), I opened a porn site, saw few pictures, and closed it within 5 minutes, then did some workout to escape,

But its night now and I am all alone in my room and feeling strong urge to watch porn, don't know what to do, I am unable to concentrate on anything,

But good news is that I got a new online female friend from Indonesia and I had a good time chatting with her.

"I will win, not immediately but definitely"

What can you do

that gets you out of your room? Can you study in the library at school? It might be wise for now.

Glad to hear about your new cyberpal. Sounds like you found your own "Courtly Companion."

Update: Day 8:

Update: Day 8:

I was totally alone in the house today my brain took it as advantage ,I struggled a lot but at 1pm in the afternoon I gave up and started viewing porn, soon I was edging and finally orgasm.

Then while bathing in the evening I got horny & masturbated 4 times in the bathroom. I was trying to create a record :D but left after 4 orgasms because it was hurting there...

Total 5 times I masturbated today.

So I failed my challenge. But I will try again and again until I get success.

I am trying my best to not to feel guilty after all this, because I tried my best.

From next time I will make sure not to get alone.

Well, since you're usually

Well, since you're usually alone in the house, i'd recommend you :

- Go out, see the world.
- Pick any sport you like. Then enjoy it.
- When you're in urge to watch porn, go watch movie (one without sexual scene) instead. Or browse some funny site or interesting site you like. video games, football, etc.
- Go play computer games instead.

Basically, when you're on the urge to watch porn, do something fun instead. And if the urge still strong, go outside untill you're calm.
Be proud because you're defeating your porn urge one moment at a time. :D

Hehe, Thanks Anon and Marina.

Hehe, Thanks Anon and Marina.
loneliness is my biggest obstacle in recovery, but I will try not to be alone from now. I will try to get more friends.

Even I'm planning to stop internet usage.
Anyways
Another new fresh start & today is Day 1. Its raining since morning here :D

I was having mild headache when I woke up, maybe it was a part of hangover because I did it 5 times yesterday :D

Today is the 13th day :D no

Today is the 13th day :D no Porn, no orgasm :)
I started early morning running & started exercising, so it keeps me busy...

And yes I followed Marina's advice looking into girls eyes... :) I got amazing results :D
Girls are interesting, Why I wasted so many years masturbating when there is so much beauty outside :D

BTW

your brain is playing tricks on you if you're watching porn...whatever your ratioinalization. Smile

Better to choose masturbation than highspeed visual erotica. Have you checked out the FAQs on YBOP?

Do you mean that I must

Do you mean that I must masturbate now? With or without watching porn?

If I do so I am sure I will feel very guilty for almost a week because I am very close to completing a month without orgasm.

I will read the Faqs right now...

*sigh*

No indeed. The cravings will pass even if you don't masturbate.

But in the future...avoid edging. It just makes the cravings worse. If you MUST release do so based on sensual touch - without fantasy or viewing porn. After all, porn is what generally causes the problems for most guys. Without porn, most wouldn't "need" to masturbate so frequently.

Many guys also find that avoiding masturbation for a time while rebooting is very helpful. It's a powerful cue for porn-based fantasy.

But better to masturbate than to edge to porn.

Go Vegan to increase willpower?? Kelly McGonigal PhD??

Marnia,
I have been reading your articles at PT and here looking for help on how to stop masturbation. Probably I've already searched "how to stop masturbation" 45,821 times but I did it again yesterday out of despair.This time there I found a site with very different perspective on increasing willpower quoting from another PT author Kelly McGonigal PhD and others. The site is www.howtostopmasturbation.com

1) Do you have any links or posts that substantiate greater self-control via a "plant based diet"?

2) Can you add some insights on how food affects ability for self regulation? In a post by your husband or yourself on PT there was a mention how the same area of the brain stimulated by high-fat junk food is the same area stimulated by porn? Is there any connection or possible relationship then between eating better and stopping masturbation (or even porn)?

Please let me know what you think. I am desperate to stop masturbation. Every time I masturbate I have feelings of such self hatred, anger, and suicidal thoughts. This has been going on for over 12 years and I really want to stop. Thanks for your help.

I did edging today because it

I did edging today because it was uncontrollable, I was unable to concentrate anywhere. But the edging session was controlled I did it only when I felt its uncontrollable, then stopped. I will quit it very soon I will buy some books to keep myself busy in free time...

I read the faqs, they are, knowledge rich,
Before I was afraid that porn has caused irreversible damage to my brain and my brain power is not going to get better if I abstain from pmo, but From faqs I learned that I was false.

Also one thing I would like to mention, I started getting dreams during sleep, This is strange I am masturbating since 7 years and I never got dreams in my sleep, I feel very good about this I guess I'm on right path...

The biggest problem I'm facing right now is that I am unable to recall things, like I'm unable to recall what I eat yesterday, but after thinking for sometime I can tell...

any solution for this?

I am planning to take some medicines that enhance cognition...

ripples

What I've experienced is periods of behavior where she will become remote. Want to be apart. Pick an argument with me over something trivial. Maybe be super critical that is somewhat out of character or unusual for her. Not want to snuggle for a bit. Those are the ripples I've experienced.

They can be very subtle especially if you do a lot of bonding with each other. Bonding seems to diminish the ripples quite a bit. And some people and couples don't experience them at all...

In general though, it seems to me, that the hotter the sex, the more orgasms and the more intense the orgasm, the more often there will be this fallout, these ripples. Although some people and couples seem to NOT experience them at all as I said...

Thanks for reply but I'm

Thanks for reply but I'm single, after the wet dream I didn't felt anything guilty like I felt just after masturbation.

The erections are hard just as it was before wet dreams, specially in morning, today I had dream of having sex with a girl and woke up just before orgasm :)
It was very close to wet dream, why are they occurring now, it never happened with me, also nowadays I don't watch porn.

It just means your body and brain are healing

They should decrease in frequency.

Can you do some socializing?

By ripples, I refer to neurochemical ups and downs after climax. Sounds like the wet dream didn't have much of an effect...other than possiblly making the second one more likely.

Are you exercising or meditating?

Day 59: After almost 2 months

Day 59: After almost 2 months without masturbation finally today I masturbated...I thought I must reward myself because I have struggled so much for 59 days so I did it, I got an intense orgasm, and I was amazed to see that a large volume of semen was ejaculated which was thick and dense. In my previous orgasms semen was almost transluscent. so I hope this is a great achievement... and I am on the right path. I hope its not harmful because I read on YBOP that some guys orgasmed during rebooting.

Also now I can understand whatever I read, my thought are organised and I feel some confidence in myself. Although I am still struggling to socialize because I am a very shy person. Anyways I am feeling great after orgasm after so long period :D

One more thing to keep myself away from porn I enrolled for a online course. Others guys who are struggling to give should also try it.
The url of website that offers free online courses is http://www.coursera.org
There are 197 free courses and you will get certificate after completion :D

At last Thanks a lot to all of you guys specially to my best friend MARINA...
I am going to continue abstaining from orgasm. Let quit Masturbation Guys...

Depends on whom you ask

Most of the components of semen seem to be reabsorbed by the body, and they would be used elsewhere. Many guys see definite benefits from cutting back on ejaculation, and for thousands of years retention of semen has been credited with those improvements.

It's possible it accounts for some benefits, but Gary thinks the biggest source of benefits is actually getting the brain back in balance. Did you watch his series on YBOP?  See http://yourbrainonporn.com/your-brain-on-porn-series

From my past experiences I

From my past experiences I know that "chaser" effect follows orgasm.

so to deal with this chaser I already started preparations after orgasm. I have to go one more month without orgasm, I usually masturbate at night so from now I will read something sacred before sleep and during day time keeping myself busy in other tasks.

Yes I masturbated without porn visualizing a girl in my mind. I hope it does not come under porn.

I feel that masturbation once a month is not harmful, isn't it?

Marnia,

Marnia,
how about having a "master of your domain" contest on your website?
Wink

I think a group synergy and competition will do a lot of good!