My "Fantasy" totally changed (day 120).

Submitted by terryman on
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Hi,
After 120days of no PMO(except 1 P and M without O) I started self massaging.
I posted about this here (just FYI not necessary to read)
http://www.reuniting.info/content/sensual-touch-should-i-stop-it

Like I wrote there, I fantasized a bit. Now, I know this self massage things is not for getting an erection and you are not supposed to fantasize. We discussed about this on the link above and this post is not about that.

I noticed when I fantasized, my fantasy didn't include any porn scenes. It was a bit surprising to me. To be honest when I was with my ex, to get even an slight erection I had to fantasize about porn scenes. But now, my "fantasy" is more about making out with a girl I know, someone is touching my penis etc. It's not me being the third person, but I'm actually in it, if you know what I mean.

Has anyone experienced that?
Do you think this is a good sign that my brain is starting to want a "real" sexual relationship though this is fantasy?

(I still couldn't get a full erection and I decided not to keep going with fantasy.)

Any input is appreciated.

I've noticed a similar thing (Day 84)

When I do have some fantasy (and I try to avoid it), I've noticed it tends to be first-person more frequently and more focused on the sensations that would be involved more than a purely mental stimulation. I find that I want things like body heat and intimacy. Somehow the fantasies seem more personal and genuine (I heard a guy on here describe his as more "noble" which made sense to me). My fantasies began to be more like this after the first month. I will say that I do feel like I'm really coming around the past few days. I felt like I turned a small corner a couple weeks ago and now I'm starting to feel that more fully. It feels like my brain is starting to be more sensitive in a good way- just feeling like I'm starting to glow a little bit. Still think I'm a good ways away, but nice to see a little progress.