my straight male lover wants to have sex with men n im confused

Submitted by rosa466 on
Printer-friendly version

as title suggests my male lover has shared with me that he would like to either have anal sex with a man (as giver) or fellatio (as reciever)
I need some help to understand what is going on in his mind to want to experiment in this way?
p.s. new to forum, Hello all and hope this post is in right place Wink

How much porn does he watch?

We've been amazed at how many guys are reporting that their sexual tastes morph all over the place because today's porn is hyperstimulating (mostly due to novelty-at-a-click). See Can You Trust Your Johnson? and Are Sexual Tastes Immutable?

If his changing tastes are due to an increasingly numbed pleasure response (as a result of chronic overconsumption of intense stimulation), then acting out his fantasies won't give him any satisfaction either. He'll just need something more, and something more. That's how addiction is. It's the promise of satisfaction, but the inability to register it because the brain's appetite mechanism is out of whack.

The thing about addiction is that he has to see his circumstances as a problem. This is not something you can do for him. Sometimes the best thing to do is to leave, unless he immediately grasps the situation and wishes to change. Boyfriend Quitting Porn? 5 Tips

I'm sorry for what you're going through.

 

different gender doesn't entitle him a license for infidelity

porn use aside.
(not that i doubt it'd probably be from porn experimentation.)
frequent porn use would be huge. but I wouldn't offer any flexibility if it had been a monogamous relationship. No special exemption. It'd be no more reasonable than him saying he's wanting to sleep with someone of a certain hair color. Relationships must not become more distant and if anything they should become deeper. This doesn't help that.

but yea, I'm also wondering how much porn he watches

How are you so sure ..

..that he is straight ? Maybe he's bi and doesn't want to acknowledge it.

As a straight guy, I can tell you that the very thought of doing something physical with another man is repulsive/disgusting to me.