FlatTire's picture
Submitted by FlatTire on
Printer-friendly version

I'm 43 years old and have been PMO free for 36 days now. Before quitting I would use PMO one to five times a day. Seven days into this reboot I had morning wood twice, but haven't had any since then. I quit porn & masterbation when I FINALLY realized that it is most likely the cause of my impotence & severe PE. I discovered porn at six and masterbation for orgasms at eleven. The had a devastating effects that it's had on me since my first experience with intercourse at sixteen. At 43 my lifelong sexual dysfunction has badly damaged my marriage in more than a few ways.

When looking around online I keep reading that older guys tend to bounce back more quickly than younger guys who started on high speed porn. However I did start out collecting porn as a preteen and would use photo magazines and many copies of Penthouse Forum in a way that is quite simular to the way I wound up using high speed porn. Even though the volume of the novelty has only grown over in the years since I started, I've always flipped from image to image so that I could cum as quickly as possible. As many times as I could.

These way I used porn make's me think it may take more recovery time than it would if I had been into edging. I'm also afraid that my severe PE will will take a really, really long time to change. If I can change it. I'm currently trying to find the correct way to do reverse kegels and have a post about it if you'd like to chime in on my inquiry: http://www.yourbrainrebalanced.com/index.php?topic=9691.msg179224#msg179224 Any help or advice would be most appreciated.

I'm glad to be a member of this forum and look forward to learning from you all. Thank you.

Sounds like you have a challege in front of you

You're right that most of the older guys recover faster because they had some real sex before they ran into highspeed. Your situation sounds a lot like this guy's story: http://www.reuniting.info/blogs/shattered Although strict avoidance of porn/masturbation did make sex with his wife possible...he has continued to slip back into porn.

Not sure why. My guess is that it's partly because he and his wife are only sexually active on vacation(!), and sleep separately. I'm thinking that kind of infrequent contact isn't enough to trump his old wiring.

Maybe you can learn from his experience. Do you have a partner? Can you emphasize daily bonding behaviors? See The Lazy Way to Stay in Love Want to play around with another approach to sex that can help strengthen your mojo without tripping the post-O neurochemical whack (that can be really tough at first while you're rebooting). If so, you might find these stories intriguing: Karezza is for addicts (too)

I'm sorry you got started so young. That definitely makes it tougher to rewire. On the other hand, the brain stays somewhat plastic forever, so, in theory, you can retrain. Have you read The Brain That Changes Itself? It's extremely inspiring with respect to the kinds of changes you're trying to make. It's written by an MD and discusses lots of interesting research on brain plasticity in an easy-to-understand way.

You're welcome here, but there aren't many guys rebooting here anymore. I try to chase them all off Wink to one of these forums:





Everything we've learned from the men recovering is collected here: www.yourbrainonporn.com

The reason I do is that I think it's good for them to be able to hear lots of guys' advice. Also, this forum didn't really evolve for rebooting. That said, you're welcome to hang around. Yes 3