July, 2013 Humor

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It's Not About the Nail

Dearly Departed

The graveside service just barely finished, when there was a massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance. The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said, 'Well, she's there.'

Famous Gender Humor

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates
 
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
- Groucho Marx
 
My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe.
- Jimmy Durante
 
Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you.
- Winston Churchill