Sparkles was deeply worried that I would be unhappy now that I quit masturbating and am looking solely to our sexual union to meet my needs.
I in turn became very clingy and needy and altogether unpleasant.
We had some conversations about it. I said, let's try to have regular snuggly time, with or without intercourse, every day, before bedtime and upon waking.
She said, that seems too rules based and mechanical.
I said, there is always a rule book whether we express it explicitly or not. Let's call it an arrangement. And since I am always ready, you are the one in control, really.
I said, let's do this for 3 weeks and see what happens. Maybe you will begin to feel the way I do, or maybe not, but just give me 3 weeks.
She said, okay.
So we started.
The first morning wasn't great. I think the fact that I woke her up had something to do with it :D
I promised not to wake her up again.
But by the evening she was very friendly and happy I think to snuggle and she invited me inside her and we had a great time. Without orgasm on my part of course, and without hers either. We carried on for a bit until I sensed she wanted to move on.
Then she wanted to read, and was I think pleased to see that I was happy for her to do whatever pleases her. We both read for awhile while we snuggled and she fell asleep. After a bit I took her reading glasses off her face and gently lay her head down and said goodnight.
Altogether a fantastic day.
Since we had this arrangement, I wasn't clingy or demanding either yesterday nor will I be today. What a relief.
This morning was very nice. We don't sleep together because I sleep sitting up in a chair, so she came downstairs and invited me up to the bed and we snuggled for a bit. Then she said she wanted to get up and we did.
I can feel a huge difference.
As Darryl would say, space has opened up here for her. This is great, really great. I am not anxious anymore and I think it has taken this turn of events to get to this point.
We'll see how things go. I'm a bit apprehensive because I have to take a business trip next week and will be away from my sweetie for three days, but oh well.