♥ this bonding stuff works

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Submitted by emerson on
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Last night we had a cuddling session and I heated it up a bit. This led to PIV and I didn't orgasm but Sparkles had a very quiet small orgasm that kinda crept up on her. Intercourse lasted about 15 minutes.

I almost came but resisted which wasn't difficult actually. I whispered to her that I was ready to go over the edge and I think she slowed down and it was subtle movements anyway. She came strictly from vaginal contact as there was no clitoral stimulation.

It could have gone on longer for me, but we were both quite sweaty and I lost my erection, and since Sparkles had orgasmed she didn't really feel like continuing.

I am not confident in the ability to maintain an erection or have another in different positions. I think this will happen in time, and we can do positions that are more relaxing than missionary or cowgirl but that's what we've been doing all these years pretty much.

I think this will happen though. I am regaining my confidence in this area. And when we cuddle if I connect more with my heated masculine side, I am starting to feel that the erections happen on their own more.

One more thing: I started a log of Sparkle's O experiences and moods so I can see the connection if there is one. I will keep this over several months and see if O with her is tied to mood swings or sleeping problems etc. I will show it to her at that time if it is illuminating. That might sound weird, but she doesn't really want to talk about it and wouldn't have much interest in it so it's up to me and I am very curious.

I have to say that after a few days ago when I was crabby and unhappy (I think from a sort of mini orgasmic experience involving nothing but non genital stroking) I felt extremely bonded and feel extremely close and the feelings that I have been experiencing are back -- the wonderful oxytocin feelings.

We snuggle in the morning and she is realizing that if she only has 5 minutes, that's fine with me and that I'm not pushy about it. So her trust in me that way is growing.

And, I asked Sparkles if she has felt closer recently and she said yes, she has. I think this morning and evening cuddling and hand holding and the rest is really having a wonderful result. I feel she is becoming more bonded this way and I'm jazzed about our progress.

One thing that inhibits this is she continues worrying about a yeast infection so she gets up afterwards and takes a quick shower. I am confident that these problems are a thing of the past but it takes longer for her to get that, and it's her business of course so I'm just not saying anything. But it does put more of a "cost" on PIV when afterwards she has to take a shower. I am sure this will diminish in time as she sees that she isn't getting a problem there at all.

And I am sure she won't either. She is more and more wet (what's the wonderful word for that again?) and it's an extraordinary pleasure without the "jam it in" mentality and I think she is feeling that too and won't have any more problems with infections.

So that's my report for today. I love your comments and experiences.



I'm really

happy for you both. You're right...she'll figure things out in her own time. You're a good pilot, emerson. Give yourself a pat on the back.


Don't worry about filling out "Community topics." That system is going to fade. The only topic that really matters is ♥, which has to go in the "Community topics" line for the system to pick it up for the left-hand "Karezza posts" link. All terms must be separated by commas, in any case.


[quote=emerson] I started a log of Sparkle's O experiences and moods so I can see the connection if there is one. I will keep this over several months and see if O with her is tied to mood swings or sleeping problems etc. I will show it to her at that time if it is illuminating..[/quote]

I'll be really interested to hear the outcome of the log you mention. I've been meaning to do the same, but somehow never committed anything to paper. From my informal survey, over many months, any connection between my wife's moods and orgasm just hasn't shown up; but the precision of my memory isn't something to be relied on, especially given the time lapse for instances of fallout to occur. I need to do something similar for myself, too. I've had several separate periods of a month or more orgasm free; but probably not two consecutive months. I wish I had recorded my occasional orgasms with more precision, so whenever my mood is poisonous, I could check before attributing it to circumstances, or simply my personality.

An actual mood ring via

An actual mood ring via orgasm sensing monitors? Track your orgasm for ultimate balance. Includes the ability to download data to the O-app. O-app data can sync with your partner's data or larger social networks if you desire.

I'm waiting for the orgasm fallout legal defense. Someone might become famous.

I'm a geezer

I just use a rhodia 12 month weekly notebook and code a few things each day.
days since last orgasm for each of us, days since my last period, any mood issues that that come up, PIV karezza. I also record meals, and sleep issues.