It's been maybe 60 days and I haven't once masturbated.
If you had asked me NOT to masturbate for 60 days in a row, anytime in the past, I would have said, are you NUTS?
Masturbation helped me go to sleep. It made me feel less like bothering my wife for sex she didn't want to have (you know, a woman with a weaker sex drive wink wink). Before marriage it made it far more manageable to be single and hardly ever be with a woman in any way.
But, it's been 60 days and I don't miss it at ALL.
No porn either, by the way. Occasionally something is a bit of a trigger and I *think* about masturbating but I never do it. Even lying at night when I sleep nude I don't feel any urge to touch my penis in a self pleasuring way and I don't.
So how did this big change come about? Something I did almost every day, or several times a day, with ejaculation, for all those decades and now I don't do it anymore?
And why don't I do it anymore?
The answer is that it is far far better now that I don't masturbate. I feel much more sexual pleasure than I did before. It is far, far more exciting in my sex life than it ever was. And oh, by the way, I am avoiding orgasms during sex too. No orgasms for emerson.
We practice Karezza. Guess what? I was having sex twice a week. Now it's been every day for the past four days and with all likelihood of continuing. I never thought I'd be having sex every day. And very wonderful, pleasurable sex that just goes on and on in the most wonderful, melting way.
It is MUCH better this way, a hundred times more pleasurable and lasts much longer and is just amazing.
And I have much more business focus and am more clear headed. It is really incredible, how much more confidence I feel and how much better I feel about life, how much more relaxed.
And I am ready for sex at a moment's notice. All the time. And the time with my wife always feels a bit like sex now. It just isn't ordinary. It is so much more special than it ever was except maybe when we first met and even then not as good as it is now.
All this from not masturbating and from not having orgasms and from engaging in bonding behaviors.
I just want to encourage you if you're having a tough time. The best thing you are ever doing is to eliminate porn, avoid masturbation at first and then make it as infrequent as is reasonable, and sublimate your sexual drives into your work and play and real life.