22 years old, five ays into recovery

Submitted by emre43 on
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Hello, I'm new here. I am 22 years old and I think I haven't been able to achieve an erection since the age of 18. I also suffer from social anxiety disorder because of a mix of the two I am still a virgin (I have never even kissed a girl). I am currently only five days into my reboot, although in between that time I had to delete over 10,000 files from my computer and saved them to a DVD and a flash drive and so I saw thumbnail size pornographic pictures (I will never watch them, but I have spent so much on them that my money would have been wasted). I have gone for nine days in the past before returning to the porn, that won't happen this time.

My libido is still very low although I fell asleep in the bath yesterday and woke up with an erection (it was decent but not perfect). I was lying on my back but although it was quite a solid erection it wasn't standing upright, it was lying on my stomach. I then noticed a slight bend at the tip of my penis and started touching it to see if I could feel the bend. Also, I have a strange situation where my sinuses produce too much mucous and deposit it at the back of my throat whenever I ejaculate. After finding myself with an erection after waking up I had the same feeling in my throat and I feel that my reboot had returned to day one after simply gaining a half-erection

Previously when I have gone without porn I have felt an increase in my libido from about the 3rd day, however, this is the 5th day and my libido feels as low as ever. I feel so lifeless but I must persist.

Can I ask a naive question, what exactly is porn because I see attractive women on TV and I want to masturbate over them, but I am stopping myself. Does this count as porn?

Stuffed nose

That's interesting, I've been suspecting a relationship between the nose and the sexual organs ever since I read something similar in a psychology book (Fritz Perls - Gestalt [something]). Unfortunately I forgot what the situation was.

As for the porn question, you're probably better off avoiding as many temptations as possible, so my opinion is to stay away from attractive women on TV.

Welcome

First of all, there's some strange connection between ejaculation...and rebooting...and the immune response of the body. No one understands it yet, but guys here often experience flu-like symptoms at some point during their reboot. And testosterone also suppresses immunity when it's high. Weird.

Anyway, put those DVDs some place you cannot get to them, wrapped in duct tape. I'm pretty sure you already wasted your money. Wink

You're right that your brain doesn't know the difference between porn and TV. http://yourbrainonporn.com/what-stimuli-must-i-avoid-during-my-reboot-di...

Moreover, during a reboot, you get even MORE sensitive to porn cues (such as hot babes) for a while. Ugh. For more: Why Do I Find Porn More Exciting Than A Partner? So hang onto your hat, Cowboy!

Start your own blog if you like.

Thanks for the link.

Thanks for the link.

Haha, I may use porn again in the future after I can get erections again but to nowehere near the same extent as I used to.

Incidentally Day 6 and no different from yesterday. I still feel limp and still have no libido.

Ubiquity

[quote=emre43]Can I ask a naive question, what exactly is porn because I see attractive women on TV and I want to masturbate over them, but I am stopping myself. Does this count as porn?[/quote]

I don't only see attractive women on TV but also on book or magazine covers and on ad billboards. Also on news sites or other "normal" websites.

So, unless I walk around blindfolded or enter a monastery or become a hermit, I won't be able to completely avoid seeing pictures of attractive women. I think the only thing we can realistically do is try to minimize the exposure and use the techniques described here against sexual fantasies (e.g. red cross/white noise).