Submitted by silverlining on
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I found this site five weeks ago and did a lot of reading. The material here clearly resonated with my earlier experiences in relationships. I'm single at this time but I decided to give abstinence from orgasms a try. Five weeks later I am really surprised at the big change in my overall character. I am more confident and I absolutely feel better about myself. I don't know if this connection already have been made here but isn't what is going on with this, at least for males, a result from increased testosterone levels? Everything I feel inside correlates to what I have read about increased testosterone levels. I did not expect the effect to be so big.

I also choose to end a long term addiction to porn at the same time, which I think is a must if abstinence from orgasms is to be achieved. I do feel that more women show me more interest nowadays but since I stopped porn and masturbation my own attraction towards women have gone trough the roof. That is the only thing that sometimes leads to frustration. I do not feel that when the cup is full the cravings for sex gets less intence. Quite the opposite, I have never been so attracted to women in my entire life as I am at this time. Sometimes it gets hard to cope. Well, just charing my experience.

All the best to everyone.


That's impressive. I'm glad you're seeing benefits.

Actually, testosterone levels don't change overall after ejaculation (although they do fluctuate slightly in a set pattern, for at least 7 days), but your observation may be correct, in essence. Experiments show that in sexually satiated male rats, *sensitivity* to testosterone decreases for a week or so (and it takes them a full two weeks to recover their full prowess...they usually "do" their partners about 8 times in a row Wink ). This means that you may be more sensitive to the effects of your own testosterone, Superman!

I'm glad you're finding women more attractive, and that they're noticing you more too. I hope one soon has sense enough to snap you up! Are you using your newfound confidence to smile at them and talk with them?

Without a partner, I don't think it's possible (or even wise) to try for avoiding ejaculation entirely. It takes two to make this balance best.

Glad you could kick the porn habit. It's easy to get hooked after a while.

Let me know if you want to blog.

Hi Marnia, Thanks for your

Hi Marnia,

Thanks for your kind words. This site and the attitude you have here is really amazing! I must ask you though, why do you not think it is possible or even wise to avoid ejaculation without a partner? 6 weeks ago I wouldn't have thought so either and even though it is frustrating at times it is possible for me and feels good most of the time. And would you believe, I actually met someone this past week and I was intimate with her without ejaculating. I don't think I will meet her again because she was a tourist in my country. But it felt so good holding her for two nights in my bed. l feel great. :)

Wow! (again)

I never know what you beautiful men are going to teach me next! Wink

My intuition (and discussions with men) says that if you're really moving the energy up through your heart - particularly in exchange with a partner - then the need for ejaculation just calms down naturally.

My only concern is that I don't want anyone to strain his body by setting some unrealistic ideal. I guess I think this redirecting of the energy has to be a natural process. That being said, I think getting off of porn and remaining celibate for a bit is a very good place to start, because it "re-sets" your nervous system and your intentions. But if someone doesn't have a partner and/or a strong practice for drawing the energy up through the heart, I would expect it would be hard to avoid ejaculation indefinitely.

Guys? What is your experience?


It was the two nights of hugs that made this work. I hate to admit this, but from a male perspective, I don't think it is as important WHO is in bed, as long as it happens, until someone 'right' comes along. And I'm talking about hugs, not standard sex. My wife would kill me if she read that one. But actually, we've talked about this side of the male psyche.

I think that nude works better. That should be obvious. Ask any man which hug he'd rather have---with or without clothes. But here is a bit of energy info that brings some light to this---

[quote]The wei chi is a superficial energy that runs over the surface of the body just inside, and above, the skin. . . .

People who can see wei chi notice that it doesn't flow through the clothing as well as it flows along bare skin. It tends to dip into the body rather than tackle the fibers, colors, synthetics and electrical charges of clothing. For example, if I look at a naked person clothed only in a pair of pants, I will see the wei chi above the surface of the skin disappear where the pants are, and then reappear where the pants end. . . .

Repetitive experiments demonstrated that if a patient wore nylon underwear while receiving acupuncture treatments, that patient would need twice as many treatments to get the same results. . . .

We often see people going for a massage and having their whole body covered except for the part being massaged. . . . Massage helps to distribute the wei chi and encourages it to flow more freely. If the therapist is good and relaxed, the wei chi will also be encouraged to synthesize the accumulated stress. The presence of coverings, both physically and psychologically, will discourage this process.


My conclusion is that, unlike when the wei chi dips out of sight in the presence of clothes, it would jump out and merge with another body when in contact, bare skin to bare skin. This is part of an explanation of what is going on when we hug someone in Sacred Sex. And why it is so effective in neutralizing our sexual tension. The whole article is good and there is a lot more there that relates to Sacred Sex, in a round about way.