Sex at Dawn

Submitted by Quizure on
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I'm reading a new book, Sex at Dawn, and there's an article in 3 + parts at Psychology Today, which is series of questions and answers from the author, and a bit of a 'contest' to win a copy of the book by posing a question of the author.

There's an interview, of sorts (similar answers) at Salon

On the other hand - there's this link, that the author linked to in the FAQ.

Either way, food for thought.


Interesting interview.

Interesting interview. Depending on the situation in which you live, you must deal with the cards you are dealt with in this life. If one is blinded, you are blinded and you must overcome. I feel this is another case where the strength of humanity must overcome urge, for while I disagree with overpopulation arguments just as I do with food shortages (it is all about too many/much in one place and not enough in another, not the total amount).

This is the world we know, no longer the jungle. Responsibility is no longer just hunting and sex (for might even been here I read it) since the elders would watch the kids as the giant orgy went down. The world we know is the parents must not only be strong enough to raise the kids, but sometimes care for the elders as well. Old methods for old times, and everyone wants it to work because deep down somewhere they are being told by the mind to go for it. This is a new dawn, and sex can be a part of it, but we all see what happens with too much of a good thing.

Chemicals are life, happiness is chemical, sadness is chemical, birth and death both just chemical reactions. Chemicals that can either make us feel anything and everything. The best to hope for is to gain enough knowledge of neurochemistry to not kill the spark of love by thinking it is pointless chemicals, but create the eternal flame to guide others to show them the way.

People can pick up on stress, as children certainly do. I see parents who stay around long enough to be there for the kid, and then split at around 20 when the kid is at college and can "handle it". Divorce of parents is much like a cold marriage that ends in one passing away prematurally, as what happened to my father right before I went up to college. I compared the eairy similiarities to that of those that only stick around long enough for the kid. Marriage may not have been the thorn that brought my dad down to sadness, but it could have been the thing that made the doctor life suck a little less.
Regardless of my situation, for I can only learn from it, when you see couples break up once magical sparks have faded yet both are the same as before, you know something happened.

We attempt to teach sex, never love, and usually that attempt is do nothing until a lousy sex ed class by a gym teacher that hasn't had sex since he was in high school. Every guy I knew already had a 300 gig porn collection by sex ed, thought they were experts to boot. Parents are in an odd spot too, how can they advocate love when they feel it is lost between the spouse they thought would be magical forever? They have been blinded, and the culture of today is being left in the dark more than ever.

With that said, we must all be the light that forms the beacon of to show others that is a life, a better life, that leads to a far greater chance of never losing love. The upbringing has made us jokers, but together not only can we become king and queens of hearts, but show others to do the same.

Go forth everyone, with love and glorious honor knowing your quest is honorable !

I did go and read the

I did go and read the article you linked to, and his responses. He doesn't seem like a very pleasant person, based on his snarky responses. At least he admitted to not knowing the neurochemistry. In his book he states that 'we're not sure what to do with it ourselves' - he's not giving advice, though he might be giving some folks the idea that this is 'our fate' as primates/apes.

Since his book was available as a Kindle book, I just got the sample which is longer than most - and I reserved the book at the library. I do like his writing style so far, but I do have a lot of books I want to read already, so I'm not spending any $ on it.


"There's this place in me where your fingerprints still rest, your kisses still linger, and your whispers softly echo. It's the place where a part of you will forever be a part of me." - Gretchen Kemp

Nice that he's got a

Nice that he's got a conversation going with the review, too.

I did finish the book, but I wasn't convinced, either. I had hoped for something better, a less 'cherry picked' version of the works of the various anthropological studies - but his was as much cherry picked as previous versions he complained about in his book.


Now I am truly confused

Not having any outside knowledge to independently verify either Marnia's or Ryan's research, I am left wondering. With all respect to Marnia's work, both authors imply the solution is doing something that does not "come naturally" in the sense that Karezza is a learned technique, and, say, polyamory is (to me) a lifestyle choice that is inviting trouble. Since status quo is obviously inadequate, I am looking for a safe way to proceed. I decided to try and keep a balanced approach: work on introducing Karezza while developing a more tolerant attitude toward possibly having more than one partner potentially. Not sure where this may lead. I must say we have so frighteningly little sex (twice a year maybe) that I only tried Karezza once, and that was not good. She did not like it. So I am not too eager to try again without making some adjustments and getting her agreement. On the other hand, I am not about to start experimenting with other people, although I have a number of "romantic friendships" that keep my juices flowing. We were together for 25+ years and I am determined to re-energize something that has become an almost sexless marriage. At present I am meeting some poly people to get the feel for the type of community it is.