Porn Free since May: How did I do it?

Submitted by djg5032 on
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Hi,

My name is Diego and I have been porn free since May. For the most part of this year I have not watched porn except for about a week in May. Before that, I used to be a porn addict ever since I was 12 years old. I am 23 right now, and I feel great and powerful having left this horrible habit behind me.

How did I do it? Out of all the methods I tried, including religious groups, online programs and sheer will power there is one that made the difference for me. It's called natural grounding. Basically, what you do is watch videos of natural women, usually from Asian countries. The idea is that you allow the true natural feminine essence that these women irradiate, to impact you just by watching the videos. You basically connect to this authentic and pure feminine source and it is quite profound and simple.

I know it sounds pretty weird, but it definitely helped me out. I started watching these videos and put music on that would produce a strong impact for me and just relaxed. The effect was immediate. The best part was that I was not drawn to watch porn anymore, and I have no desire to do so. I don't have any urges to fight, because there are no urges to begin with.

By the way I no longer do natural grounding because I feel conditioned pretty strongly. I also don't watch TV and avoid any sources of media that will provide any strong stimulus showing too much skin as it provides no value to my life whatsoever.

Here's the link for more information about these process. Give it a shot!

naturalgrounding.net

never tried

Well, I never tried this. It seems natural grounding weird but one thing I really agree is avoinding to "watch TV and any other sources of media that will provide any strong stimulus showing too much skin as it provides no value to my life whatsoever". I also try to read as much as possible about my problem it seems knowing the enemy makes me stronger to fight. I found very good article in quitporn.net.

wrong reference

[quote=bannerd46]Well, I never tried this. It seems natural grounding weird but one thing I really agree is avoinding to "watch TV and any other sources of media that will provide any strong stimulus showing too much skin as it provides no value to my life whatsoever". I also try to read as much as possible about my problem it seems knowing the enemy makes me stronger to fight. I found very good article in quitporn.net.[/quote]

Hi, I just mentioned the wrong address to the articles. This is the correct one:http://quitporn.net/blog/. Some of the articles encouraged me to change the way of thinking about my problem and believe there is hope to me "One must try to eliminate negativity and trust on positive, as you get more and more positive, your trust level and courage will increase, courage bring new opportunities to life, new wonders to life, and if you make courage as a habit, life will become golden".

I've read all but like the

I've read all but like the last 2 or 3 chapters of natural grounding method.

I understand kind of what the author is saying, if only he could stop referring to videos that portray prepubescence associated with sexual intercourse and suggesting that all women be seen as little girls. I can see Goddess, but what about an adult Goddess? And further, are women always to be seen as little girls, who cannot even choose what's best for them, and weak/submissive? No, yea I understand the purity of 'non-sexual', or just 'innocence' is present in prepubescent girls, but you can see that in adult women as the adults they are, not having to see them as having prepubescent personalities, but just the certain qualities that may be in that personality.

This was written by a Pick up artist, with a lot of products. I can just see all the wanna be "PUAs" talking about this as being the 'secret' and being pompous and twisted like they have special access to 'prepubescent personalities' in women letting 'be their daddies' having their way with them. NLP. PUAs know about NLP and brainwashing tactics. There was one PUA book that has the title "CIA Brainwashing Tactics to get Laid". Really.. It just depends on what you use it for and your intent right?

I mean, I never grew up having many female friends, maybe I should have. So it's possible that it's simply 'normal' to see 'little girls' in adult women, and sometimes it's ok, I'm just not used to it. But many women also do use this personality and fertilization driven act to manipulate men or simply play dumb? I just think the 'prepubescent qualities' can be seen in adult women as well, but not have to be strictly associated with prepubescent personalities.

I dont mean offense, but many of these women would go ahead and use this for their own agenda, yet look down on the men they 'manipulate', and men would also take advantage of such things as well.

common ground

Zone, I agree with your assessment. I looked at the link, and although it does not immediately advertise a product, there is a testimonial on the first page...and testimonials are almost always associated with someone trying to push some bullshit or other. Without reiterating everything you said, I think you probably identified most of the important problems with this program.

Yep,

I had a more thorough look, and for once, Zone, I completely agree with you...but for your PS about your obsession with women manipulating men. Smile

I found this program

I found this program intriguing. I agree the testimonials do make me suspicious. But I have no plan to buy any products. But I think this guy makes a good point, seeing the true essence of a woman. When you see a hot woman in public, that porn trigger is right there with you. I caught myself doing that and wanting porn more and more until I finally gave in.

I disagree with the Zone about the videos being prepubescent. I didn't think of that at all. I think it's seen that way because western culture is so blatantly sexual. Asian culture, on the other hand, is quite innocent compared to the west. I think what he is trying to say is to look at a woman as a woman. Not as a sex object as we can easily do with porn and other media out there, music videos, etc.

I watched a few videos and I would say it felt good watching them. Watching a beautiful woman that doesn't exploit her sex appeal was quite relaxing.

So, maybe he's pushing a product. Let's put that aside for now. My question is, why this wouldn't work? What are people's objections to this?

I will give this a shot and report back later.

well the author did state,

well the author did state, in his own words "the true sexual essence of a woman is the prepubescent girl inside her". That is what I'm against. I'm not against the other points he makes, which I agree with, but I think it does get mixed up with the concept of "prepubescence". But who am I to judge? Maybe all women have little girls in them, but I don't like to see it that way, because one can have little girl and 'fertile' qualities without actually being just like a little girl, with the 'negative' qualities of being immature and ignorant and such.

virtual reality dissatisfaction

Maybe you're right. Who am I to judge? I'll explain why I would not use this program, but I don't claim that this rationale is appropriate for anyone but me. I personally disagree with the idea that watching videos of ideally beautiful women can somehow improve relationships with real women; I think that the opposite may be true.

Porn constructs an unrealistic sexual expectation, and we start to expect real women to be like porn women, physically, mechanically, emotionally. When real women don't measure up to porn women, we get dissatisfied. These videos would create the opposite construct. If we watch enough perfectly innocent, physically flawless women singing karaoke or dancing around, then we'll start to expect real women to be this way in nonsexual contexts. And then when they get pissed off at us, or when their shit smells just as objectionable as our shit, or when they look natural because they haven't put on several metric tons of makeup, or when they don't wear sexy clothes and dance around for us before an urban sunrise backdrop...when all of this happens--and it will, often--then we'll be dissatisfied with real women for failing to measure up to the ideal of these perfect video women. So I think that the best way to approach relationships with women is to interact with the real ones. Neither porn nor these 'natural grounding' videos have any bearing on the behavior and nature of women in the original reality.

Also, I find it difficult to agree that Asian cultures are innocent. Who invented bukkake and hentai? Who invented foot binding and water torture and gunpowder? What happened in Cambodia? How did the Japanese behave during world war II? Why does most of the pedophile sex tourism happen in Thailand? We're all have the same brains / you can't find this 'innocence' anywhere, even in children.

But as I said, this is my perception. If it works differently for you, then great!

Ha ha ha!

"Metric tons of makeup" Smile

Yes, the whole planet has been on a limbic brain-induced sexual spree for a while. The fact that various versions of karezza are found in so many places, sometimes developed independently of other cultures, shows that we all have similar potential, similar wiring...and similar weak points. Well said.

Hey guys, thanks for the

Hey guys, thanks for the comments. I'm glad that we can have different opinions in a cordial manner. Another reason why I enjoy the conversations on this forum. You make some valid points. The Zone, my apology, I didn't realize the author made the comment about prepubescent girls. As for Asian culture, what I meant to say was that in relation to western culture, sex appeal in Asian culture is perceived by many as much more innocent. Obviously this is not the case. People are people anywhere in the world.

I get what you are saying about watching perfectly flawless women and possibly being dissatisfied later on. Although watching the videos I never had this idea that they were the perfect, flawless women. I just found them fun and uplifting to watch. As well, I didn't have this urge to ravage them. I can tell you one thing, I would rather much feel this essence of a woman rather than than a porn star essence.

As for meeting real women, that is much more ideal. To just see them for who they are. They are not perfect. But like you said, if you do meet an attractice woman and have been using porn habitually, that will trigger a certain response. This, I have finally come to realize. Another good reason to quit porn. But if this is true, then what would be the way to not have this stimulus response? My only guess would be that over time, as those old porn neurons get replaced with newer and more constructive ones, then you would not have this response. Has anybody experienced this? I am very curious to know. Thanks.

The author, Rion Williams is

The author, Rion Williams is contradictory. He says to disregard the 'porn personality' yet in his other material he sounds like a pornstar himself, referring to women in a very raunchy and dirty sort of way. Later on he says you can 'watch porn videos' and connect with the 'true sexual essence of woman' without becoming 'disturbed' if you have been doing natural grounding for a long time or are up to that level, I guess because like you said, you would see it "innocently." BUt I disagree, not all porn has the right associations attached to it, and are not educational and really dark/twisted.

So I guess, if ur doing the natural grounding stuff.. just watch videos of women u like, are innocent,and are not attached to very materialistic concepts, etc.

still changing...

First, let me apologize for my hasty statement about the innocence of Asian culture. One of my biggest flaws is being judgmental (I blame primarily an East Coast upbringing). I know virtually nothing about Asian cultures first-hand, so I should really refrain from deciding that the cultures are depraved simply because some depraved media or behaviors originate in them. I guess there are elements of western culture that are good (e.g. origin of human rights movements) even though there are diametrically opposed elements as well (e.g. eugenics).

Concerning diminution of the porn response: there may be ways to over-write the pathways (or however it works neurologically). But the time required for perception to return to what passes for our normal, porn-free level of perversion may not be overly long. After I was able to stay away from porn for at least 40 days at a time, I genuinely stopped envisioning attractive women sans clothes. Of course, it took a couple of years to get to that point.

An additional thought: do we feel certain essences of women, or do we project preconceptions onto women? I'm not going to try to answer that question because I'm pretty sure it should be answered by an actual woman. But I could ask a similar question about men, for example, "do I have an alpha male essence?" And I don't think there is a straightforward answer. It is very difficult to distill a complex personality into essence like oil from a leaf, or something. I know there is utility in the reductionist approach, but maybe here is one case where utility is not appropriate. In relationships, perhaps we should not be using but rather interacting.

Thanks to you as well for the civil discussion!

Thanks TheZone. I did some

Thanks TheZone. I did some research on this guy to. You're right, this guy sounds like a sleazeball. And I agree, all porn is unhealthy, period. It's sad to think that porn and PUA stuff feed off of the insecurities of men.

I agree that the person

I agree that the person delivering the message is not congruent or in line with its content. He is trying to sell products and make a living. HOWEVER, if you approach Natural Grounding from the mindset of connecting with pure female energy source, WHATEVER that may be for you, then you will reap great benefits.

If you guys have issues or problems with Asians being the only naturals as expressed by Rion, and innocence being referred to as "unlocking the inner girl inside", then I suggest you look for your own sources that make you feel elated or connected to purity. That is the point, that is the message, and whatever method you choose doesn't matter as long as you start to get conditioned or connected.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gm1uNgHw6Xo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9G2pew3_SnQ

One of the key aspects to

One of the key aspects to become porn-free is to stop fighting it! The more you focus on getting rid of the addiction, the more attention you are bringing to porn! What you appreciate, appreciates. Whatever you focus on, amplifies. Focusing on getting rid of porn, is an uphill struggle and will leave you exhausted.

An easier way to quit porn is to first make the decision to do so, and let go. It's really simple. You choose to focus on other activities, thoughts or events that make you feel good. That's it! In my case I constantly choose sources that make me feel pure, carefree, light and happy, and avoid other sources that provide no value whatsoever, like TV, magazines, gossip blogs, etc. I love listening to music or watching inspiring videos for their own sake, and that is the beauty of my rituals.

I first got into Natural Grounding to get more women and to become more attractive to them. Little did I know, that it would cure my addiction to porn almost immediately. It was that easy and simple for me after having tried multiple methods which I have mentioned before. This method was so effective for me, because I was not focused on GETTING RID OF PORN, it just happened to be a fantastic side-benefit, so effortless and natural.

My opinion is that Rion has a better shot at marketing his material as a cure to porn, than to get women. That's another issue, but his work did nothing for me in that respect, which is why I stopped doing Natural Grounding. My original suggestion was more geared towards watching the videos that make you feel good, and make you connected and conditioned to what makes you feel pure and free. It really doesn't have to be videos, but it can be any activity like meditation, running, writing, etc. what you do doesn't matter as long as you access this state I'm referring to.

Nowadays, I watch my own mind-movies and inspirational videos every morning and before I go to bed as a ritual. I certainly feel great when I watch them and that is the purpose. Sometimes thoughts about porn or fantasizing pop-up, but they simply wash away. It is effortless. I don't fight them or resist them, but consciously choose to focus on what empowers me. I am free.

I have chosen to share two of my mind movies: (btw they have nothing to do with women or porn, but are inspirational in essence)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N0Enn-ddUsI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xF-_cWz8fuM

Hope this helps.

Meat that you eat, not beat!

The only flesh that I've been indulging in is the steak on my plate! And it's tasty! :) Being abstinent is no fun if you're never going to tip the scales. What's the point of always being on the verg of an ejaculation every time you think about sex? The pratice can turn one into a sexual introvert! I'm just addicted to the testosterone increase and energy it promotes. Although I must admit that after days of Mbing to porn I start to feel burnt out. You just have to pull yourself out of the old habits and try stroking a cat instead, or going for a long walk, and don't be too hard on yourself. Erupting on a more spiritual level is the way to go, so what are you waiting for? Get out there and squeeze every ounce of the juice of life you can, and don't forgrt to drop a load of your troubles and just be! Wink

All life is sorrowful and the world is an ever burning fire, so enjoy the stately dance of the mystic bliss beyond pain, for that is at the heart of every mythic rite.

Been watching natural

Been watching natural grounding videos for 2 weeks now and it has helped me alot. Urge to masturbate and watching porn is much mucg less. And I feel that I look at girls differently. I would recommend at least to try it.

sorry I do not understand

sorry I do not understand how watching young attractive women with tight or little clothing on dance around on my computer screen is going to help my cravings for porn in a good way. I went to the link and watched a bit of several videos there one I could not watch more than a few seconds. Young attractive female with short shorts on shaking her ass on the screen was not helping any cravings for porn at least not for me.

I know I bash things a lot just can not help myself. So yes I still deal with mental shit in my head. I am getting better at dealing with it but not in complete control as you can see.

I am glad it has helped some and I hope it is helpful to others I just do not see it for me.

I cant really explain why it

I cant really explain why it works for me. It just does. I try to watch the videos with less skin exposure and a normally choose videoes of Palmy.
I think her behavior is very natural without any teasing og trying to be sexy. Its very seldom to see girls with natural behavior in todays media I think.
They say its a way to reprogram your brain to be able to watch the natural sexuality and behavior of a women, a reprogramming thats takes a long time if u are used to watching teasing and slutty women for years from the porn movies.

I am not sure if the explanation for natural grounding in valid. And I was of course sceptical in the beginning. But after a a few days of watcihng it 30-1h each night before bedtime I felt something changed in me. So thats why I have continued
They videos of palmy definately dont make me think about sex or get me horny, I get more emotional when watching her behavior and performance.
Maybe people are different and that some need very little "stimulation" to wake up the "porn brain". Then maybe the videos are not good to watch. I am not sure.

Here are some videos where he talk about the media and how it influences us and how to change it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5173vkomHPk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73d1X79F0PA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w9F07cdI8zM

Here are some natural grounding vidoes I like to watch:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IrF31kP-w2o
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=it79dPC3egE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K84OwSM7kcI
http://www.youtube.com/user/sage007#p/c/9EDBB35A6B492FF4/6/IJPWPIEEWYM

I've been trying this out

I've been trying this out too. I'm always willing to experiment with things, even if I don't understand them or they seem weird, cause you never know when you'll find that gem of wisdom you didn't see before.

I admit, the whole thing is a little weird to me. However, I also have noticed that my cravings for porn or masturbation aren't nearly as strong. I don't know if it's the videos, or just a gentle wave in the storm of abstinence, or the fact that I currently have a cold. Based on my experience so far, however, I'm not necessarily going to dismiss this practice right away.

Yes it feels wierd in the

Yes it feels wierd in the beginning. watching videos of girls singing in thai. And not even music I normally like to listen to. wtf :)
But it get easier after a while. Point is according to what I have read is that u get best effect if u are not judgemental when watching, just accept it, even if it feels strange, gay, or whatever. and dont whatch it and expect to get something out of it. dont expect an outcome right here and now.
If u get emotional before watching it effect should be stronger.
This video first for example and then the natural grounding videos: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mK29iPaQDbg
Think its helps dissolving your judgemental ego before watching the NG videos.

Ok I am just writing what I have read about this. Good luck.
Oh btw I have become abit less nervous around girls after starting this.

I guess that's alright.

I guess that's alright. Although some of the videos recommended by Rion still do somewhat have teasing. Like, common fashion for females is teaser. Yea that teasin and flaunting in our faces can have an effect on the male brain, puts us on overdrive. Can also make you feel miserable (like me a lot of times) especially around other guys, it makes you feel like you're in a competition and it just brings back lots of memories, of all the associations attached to violent competition. But it's all fun and games right? Wrong not when you're left out for no good reason. You're not just a "loser", this is real life, not a game. You would have men who get (dopamine) rushes off this competition and getting that rush abusing women, in front of your own eyes while the girl wholly accepts it and takes it because he "has it like that". She can also get (dopamine) rushes because it symbolizes male power, that she has a "good catch", and he's "badass", and he's no "goody two shoes" because he can be promiscuous and he can also threaten and intimidate by fear, they both feed off of fear and become prideful. She has no patience for anything "less". She wants the drama that surrounds it because well, life has to be with drama, it has to be exciting, it has to be filled with adrenaline, addiction to dopamine and adrenaline. Though even though most women would say they don't fall for this, or that some women are different, what they say is different from what they do (many times), because it's absolutely subconscious to them or it just bypasses them. Then the excuse is developed that well, he's just arrogant, and she's arrogant because that's why "high status" people do, and must do.. it's a natural thing and in fact must be to deal with "lower status" people and even competitive "high status" people. Their hearts become hardened. She also becomes immune to such "lower status" people, she cannot stand them.

"First, do what I did, and

"First, do what I did, and create an altar in your room dedicated to Divine Feminine. Put only symbols of the feminine on it. I have a painting called "Beatrix" by Dante Gabriel Rossetti. I have a statue of Quan Kin. Populate your altar with anything that reminds you of the feminine, and spend a few minutes of the day in worship. Yes, worship. Adoration. Devotion. Offer up rose petals. Offer poems. Offer everything, and beg Her to reveal Her innermost essence to you. This will work miracles whether you're single and waiting to meet the right woman or whether you're already in relationship and long to meet your woman in a deeper way."

http://www.soulscode.com/taking-the-final-steps-towards-successful-woman...

not sure if this applies

but to desensitize young people afraid of dogs, they show them a video of a young person having healthy interactions with nice friendly dogs and this does work.

I wonder if videos couldn't be made that could have women and men interacting in mature and happy and healthy ways and people could watch that to restore their brains. Maybe they could do that in Hollywood. Nah, probably not.