As I mentioned before on this blog, my husband and I are about to have our first child (a son) at the end of next month. We both feel really strongly that we want to have an open attitude about sexuality as parents, but we have no role models in how to do this!
We plan on practicing the family bed, first of all. Bed-sharing is part of the whole Attachment Parenting movement, of which the basic idea is that parents and children should bond with each other through bed sharing, babywearing, breast feeding, and compassionate parenting practices. It's a lot of the same ideas behind Karezza, really. But the first thing people always ask when they hear you're going to share a bed with your kids is... but what about your sex life??
Since we have started practicing Karezza, it seems a lot easier to picture how sex will fit in with this kind of parenting. It doesn't seem weird to picture us having sex while our child sleeps nearby, and it doesn't seem embarrassing or possibly traumatic if the kid wakes up and catches us in the act (because there is nothing "dirty" about our sex anymore! It's just mommy and daddy giving love to one another). As a former anthropology student, I am well aware that most families in the world sleep in all one bed together, or at least all in one room, and sex takes places whenever the kids fall asleep or whenever there is time during the day to sneak away. Seems reasonable to me but... I was hoping there were some couples out there who could give advice from first-hand experience. One of the nice things about Karezza is that it can go on for hours but... I can't picture realistically having a whole hour or more with my husband when there are young kids to take care of (unless they are super great nappers). But daily bonding behaviors seem doable...