(tornfromabook) We like to take deep breaths together when we stop moving. And sometimes there is a little giggling.
(wfk007) Practice, practice, practice. It took us a few times to really start to get it. After a while there are things that happen in karezza that are better than orgasm—which is a good incentive. There is an energy transfer that can be amazing. There is also a relaxation response I get sometimes which is better than meditation. But that has come from practicing (and what a terrible thing to have to do, lay naked with a beautiful women!)
Even after around four months of it, we still have to watch the heat. When I get deep into karezza, I feel everything, and the stimulation is amazing. We have to watch it to make sure we don't fall back to our old ways.
(Quizure) For us it's been much more about focusing on slowing down and being in the moment more than it is about avoiding orgasm. Not having an orgasm is the by-product, not the goal. We've been doing this 18 months or so, and we're not orgasm 'free'. And it doesn't bother us that we're not. Sometimes, it comes out of the blue, and other times, we are surprised at what simple little thing triggered one. It takes time to become more sensitive. We're retraining our brains, as well as our bodies to feel the more subtle and delicious sensations that Karezza delivers.
I would say it was at least 6 months before we had really found our groove. We went from having sex just twice a month, to everyday for awhile, and then every other day. This gave us lots more opportunities for 'learning experiences'. And the orgasm frequency actually went up, compared to the sex-2-times a month that was usual for us.
When you don't have a lot of time for good quiet 'connecting' time - sex or no sex, that makes Karezza a little harder, as you are left feeling touch deprived, and a little 'hungry' for sex. I'm not sure when I started setting the alarm early, but I make sure we have 15 minutes to 1/2 hour of semi-awake time to snuggle naked every day. It's really easy to feel needy and 'hot', as you say, when you're feeling lonely or touch-starved.
(Marnia) Stop moving and focus on what you are feeling in your genitals. Wait until things calm down before you start again.