Day 84 - too many wet dreams

Submitted by goosewort on
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I started this mostly out of curiosity, had no ED nor heavy porn use, but the withdrawal symptoms were pretty much as other have reported so I guess I still had some addiction.

I feel this process helped me grow in many ways in my personal life, so I would like to continue being abstinent at least until I get a partner.

Plus, still can't seem to get used to the magnetism you get around girls. Maybe I'm just paranoid but they seem to hold on to conversations longer, even when you are done talking.

I'm also more 'aggressive', meaning that I don't take bull pretty well and I'm also pretty immune to women's charms. They get away with lots of shit from average porn-user guys. Take my new roommate, ten years older than I, she literally tried to turn myself and this other guy into her slaves, by giving us all kind of bull about how much she does and we don't, when in fact we were doing pretty much all the work around the house. When she pulled that one too many times we had a little chat where I told here how it works which literally left her speechless. Next night, she got wasted drunk and slept for two days to recover. Wasn't vulgar or anything, just made it very clear she's not getting a medal just for being a woman, and for sure I'm not ok with bullcrap.

This is day 84 no PM but I've had 13 wet dreams on days 9, 22, 30, 40, 49, 50, 60, 66, 67, 71, 77, 83 and 84. They seem to get more frequent. This worries me, plus, on the day after, I get headaches and stomach cramps, which are not very pleasant, though they have subsided somewhat lately. I remember after the wet dream on day 9 I literally had migraines for almost two days afterwards.

What are your thoughts on this whole wet dream problem?

In young men wet dreams may

In young men wet dreams may function to keep healthy sperm around, as after 7 days without ejaculation sperm quality declines. Mother Nature wants you to seek out females - and impregnate them. No need for the later, but seeking out companionship is the whole point of getting back your mojo.

Keep in mind that rebalancing your brain fron porn use is not a cure all, especially roommate issues.

No wet dreams after 61 days

I'm currently taking a personal 90-day no-pmo challenge due to (what I believe is) porn-induced ED. As the title says, I've successfully stood my ground for 61 days, yet I haven't had a single wet dream so far. Have you encountered anything like this before? Should I be worried? Is it somehow indicative of the 'healing process' or lack thereof?

Wait a minute. So what is

Wait a minute. So what is happening to my sperm quality (Day 52)? I have had many wet dreams during the reboot but I haven't noticed any discharge. Will it come back when I return to a more regular schedule of ejaculations?

There's no reason

your sperm quality should change at all. The first ejaculation will blow out the broken sperm (they break up as they sit around) and the fresh ones your body makes will be tip top.

In my experience

in a (potential) new relationship, both parties have to have a high tolerance for "bullcrap" for a while. By that I mean, they have to let go of some of their harsh judgments. Why? Because neither person is seeing the other person very clearly. And both are edgier than usual.

What can you do to find some companionship with women you would respect? What interests do you have? What groups could you participate in? Ideas:

The first book I read on "cultivating male sexual energy" had a Q&A in the back with a guy asking your question. The Daoist master answered, "If you keep having wet dreams, listen to your body and find a woman."

84 days is great. It may be time for the next step....

*big hug*

I got that

And I think frank remarks can be very healthy sometimes. Wink

I was just thinking some of that might be spilling over into potential relationships too.

We totally agree that Mother Nature needn't rule our sexual behavior, but she has pretty complete control over wet dreams, it seems. Smile That said, people here have noticed that "eating a bag of chips" sometimes causes them (!), perhaps because junkfood can also be a superstimulus. And traditionally, those who want to avoid ejaculating counsel that it's good to avoid spicy foods.

Don't know of any science behind those, but they might be worth experimenting with. Ya never know....

Neah, I'm zero carbing for a

Neah, I'm zero carbing for a few weeks now, so no chips nor spices.

I started working out recently so maybe the muscle tension triggers more wet dreams.

Thing is, I'm not even sure I want a relationship. Maybe the only reason we want women is to substitute for distanced or overbearing mothers.

Yesterday I had a frightening thought. I was walking home, paying attention to all the unnecessary tension that overlaps with everything we do. The unsettled mind which cannot stop thinking. Then I thought that what people usually call success is just a hope that one day we will have what the successful people seem to have: peace, quietness, self control, the disappearance of the tension. So, we're on the wrong track, money is not going to solve our problems, but paying attention and suffering through the pain might end the tension.

When I started this whole reboot I thought it would go completely different. It's a painful process. It didn't bring me to where I imagined, but it did bring me to a place I love/hate. I hate it because of the pain and struggle, love it because I feel it makes me better, like steel through fire. I'm more ready to observe all the pain that must have been with me forever but I always looked for distractions to keep me away from it.

So, that's why I don't know if I want a relationship. I want my own little cave to sit and sort things through. When I'm done, who knows what my interests will be. Until then the wet dreams are nagging.

Sorry, I know I'm rambling. It's like I have to say many things but at the same time know this is a very personal journey which another can only understand by travelling himself.

You're right

that a time-out from relationship for some soul-searching can be very worthwhile. But remember that you are a tribal, pair-bonding primate. Mothers aren't the only issue. Wink

Most of my balance

is due to having Gary in my life. I'm serious about that. I want you to know that you guys potentially have a *lot* of influence in helping your partners to be the best they can be (and vice versa). Never underestimate your power.

That's interesting, maybe

That's interesting, maybe Marnia or Gary can tell us more.

I would personally feel pretty crappy after the wet dreams.

P.S. I'm finally getting on a stretch of uninterrupted abstinence: 13 days and counting.

Great, Marnia, wish I

Great, Marnia, wish I figured it out earlier. It makes a lot of sense now: when you stop masturbating the penis becomes much more sensitive, so tight underwear can make a big difference in terms of wet dreams. Kicking myself. Well, this is day 14 no PMO, personal record.

I'm making more eye contact

I'm making more eye contact that's for sure. Girls sometimes look intimidating, but not these days. I'm like: baby, you have no idea what fire lies in my belly LOL.

There was this girl in the library today, she was checking me out, and when I left she was busy pretending not to notice me. I never realized how obvious those things are. It was pretty funny.

Marnia, please enable my blog, it'll be easier to keep track of my progress.


Sorry, I assumed you were enabled to blog. You are now.

Glad to hear about those flirting ladies. Sounds like you're gonna have to peel them off of you soon. Wink


That's rad that you're on Day 84! WHOOT.
[quote=goosewort]P.S. I'm finally getting on a stretch of uninterrupted abstinence: 13 days and counting.[/quote] I think you mean Day 84 of no PM, and now 13 days of no orgasm from sex with a woman. Right? I reckon that having sex could influence wet dreams.

About those wet dreams: I appreciate that you're worried about them and the increasing frequency. What about it worries you? That there's something wrong with you?

Your 'zero carbs' lept out at me. Certainly you're getting SOME carbs, right? At least some vegetables, maybe fruit?! I wonder if letting them rise to 100-150g/day would affect anything.

Basically, man, I think you're stylin'. I'm Day 32 of no PMO and I envy/praise a guy who is almost 3 months! ROCKIT

This is actually day 115 no

This is actually day 115 no PM and day 13 no O. I was plagued by many wet dreams during this time and the longest I went without ejaculation was 13 days in the beginning, so no reason for envy.

If anything I envy 32 days honest no PMO. You're the man.

I felt the wet dreams left me drained, maybe less than normal orgasms but still noticeable. It was ridiculous because they were caused by my boxer briefs (washing got them on the snug side, it took me a while to realize). As soon as I switched to boxers, things got much better.

The challenge is only beginning: no PMO is the ultimate goal. P and M I have successfully fought for over 100 days but I expect the heavy withdrawal symptoms to come from excluding the O.

For now I'm high energy and hopeful it will go smoothly. Tomorrow is day 14 no PMO and that is history in the making for me.

P.S. I'm zero carb (eggs, pork, beef and water) - long story.


I hadn't noticed Day 84 was back in September.

I haven't had any wet dreams, so what do I know? From this link, though, it seems that wet dreams don't 'count'!:

What I take from that is...we can't really choose to not have wet dreams. How are you gonna 'exclude' them? Either way, good work, keep it blazing!

Wet dreams are terrible

I agree with Sivananda:

"[Wet dreams] have sapped the vitality or the very essence of many students and even grown-up people and has made them physical, moral and spiritual bankrupts." — Sivananda 1934

I created a system for myself to stop wet dreams. I teach it on my course: