We finally cracked the delayed ejaculation problem. I had an orgasm for the first time in her presence. I needed one hell of a lot of stimulation to get me there but what an orgasm! She was so delighted :) Delighted for me but also for herself as she said she felt a little inadequate not being able to get me to orgasm (a role reversal on the stereotypical male-female sex problem).
After that the next two were easier and more natural. It felt like I broke a mental block. I've been thinking about what had caused my delayed ejaculation during sex 'problem'. I was consciously holding back from orgasm during the reboot. I read another rebooter's blog post that said orgasm with his girlfriend had slowed the reboot process. I therefore decided I would abstain from orgasm during sex as well as M. I would stop all stimulation whenever things got too heavy (blue balls galore). So perhaps when I decided it was time to O my mind had been programmed against it. I would then try hard and that made it impossible. I like Marnia's advice to try reverse psychology "Tell yourself you don't want to ejaculate no matter what...and you will".
As for everything else, well it's improving but there is still some tweaking to do. I'm having problems with loosing my erection when getting a condom on. I feel like my erections are still a little 'fragile' at the moment. This extra step just adds to the challenge. So we ended up using the withdrawal method, which we both said that we cannot do again (both clean from STI's but pregnancy concerns) as it's just asking for problems (although adds a very interesting stop-start flow to sex). If I am not hard I can pretty much guarantee a full erection if I enter soft or semi-hard. It's also possible to have sex even if I am not fully erect, whereas a condom will become loose. We talked about her going on the pill. She didn't say she wouldn't but mentioned her side effects and her somewhat forgetful memory (she mentioned injection instead). She said she always used a condom when on the pill before. I told her I don't want her to do anything she doesn't want to do, so we'll crack the condoms!
2 weeks till our next meet up :( but in a way the distance 'challenge' makes us savour our time together.