I was a once a contented product of the sexual revolution--or so I believed. My family was open and sensible about discussing sex, and barely religious. I concluded that orgasm was pure pleasure and the best possible relationship glue.
Article by Marnia Robinson and Gary Wilson
Human love lives are complex. One of the underlying reasons may be that we have two conflicting genetic programs at work in our limbic system, both of which have subtle, but powerful influences on our intimate relationships.
Even though sexual utopians can no longer boast (as loudly) about Bonobo nonviolence, they often maintain that Bonobo promiscuity would be suitable for humans-presumably because we share a lot of genes and even some behaviors.
However, the sexual utopians are forgetting one thing. Bonobos don't have "pair-bonder brains." We do.
This series of mini-articles is a work in progress, but it gives a good overview of the key concepts addressed on this site. The items are in a loose order, from the top down.
Men who are willing to experiment with foregoing orgasm are my heroes.
To be sure, most of them only make the experiment because they have exhausted all the usual alternatives. But then, so did I. Perhaps they are tired of feeling restless and anxious because a partner “isn’t giving them enough sex.” Or maybe they have rationally tried to solve the excess-libido problem on their own by producing orgasms with the help of Internet porn, or some other outlet—only to discover that this course of action left them hungrier than ever, that is, increasingly dependent upon the compelling brain chemistry of their chosen stimulation reinforced by orgasm.
In Hugs for Heroes we looked at what women can do to make it easier for men to practice sexual continence over the long haul. In this article we'll look at how eager partners can help their more unenthusiastic partners lower their resistance to intimacy.
As we’ve seen in earlier articles, neurochemical urges motivate mammals to eat, drink and have sex. Specifically, dopamine surges in their primitive reward circuitry send them after the things that further their survival—or at least the survival of their genes.
But what about the handful of mammalian species who have evolved to team up in order to do a better job of raising their young? They may get all the food, water and sex they want, and still feel that something is missing—until they are mated.
Learn about an inspiring new model for sexuality, created by Chilean Psychologist Franscisco Moreno. Here are his remarks describing it.
Transorgasmic sex is based in thermodynamics, and heavily influenced by the work of C. G. Jung. I use the term "irreversible expansion" (for example, an atomic explosion) for the orgasmic experience, and "reversible expansion" (for example, a nuclear reactor) for the transorgasmic experience.
Transorgasmic consciousness has existed in all cultures. It does not belong to sexuality only. Even in sports and other physical or aesthetic disciplines we find experiences similar to transorgasmic.
A male friend, pictured here, said my book needed to address this question, so here's an excerpt from the new book that does so. Feel free to add your comments to the end of the article.
One reason people often believe that orgasm is purely a beneficial outlet is that it seems to solve the problem of too much sexual energy—or perhaps too much semen if you’re male. This impression seems irrefutable, in part because wet dreams are a natural phenomenon of adolescence. It’s logical to assume that the body is making extra semen that has nowhere else to go.