Cupid's Poisoned Arrow Topics

Can giving up sex improve your love life? Devotees insist 'sex free' love-making can revive tired marriages. SHONA SIBARY and her husband gave it a try

Hands off! Karezza is from the Italian meaning of 'caress'NOTE: Obviously, Shona didn't realize that "bonding behaviors" are not karezza. Hopefully she'll figure out that karezza calls for intercourse!

After 13 years of marriage to my husband Keith, it’s fair to say that our once-active sex life has become a little sluggish. Recently, my libido seems to have given up the ghost, and too many nights are spent sleeping back-to-back in huffy silence. So when I asked Keith how he felt about testing out a revolutionary new sexual technique called ‘Karezza’ that I’d read about on the internet, he could not have responded more positively. In fact, he was so enthusiastic that I didn’t have the heart to tell him that a key part of this sexual technique was…er…not having sex — something we were already pretty expert at.

Rethinking Ogas and Gaddam's 'A Billion Wicked Thoughts'

Cover - 'A Billion Wicked Thoughts'Does Internet porn reveal our sexual desires—or alter them?

Fellow "Psychology Today" blogger Leon F. Seltzer recently completed a herculean 12-part blog series on the subject of the Internet and human sexual desire (based on Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam’s A Billion Wicked Thoughts, 2011). In his final segment, he did an excellent job of outlining the risks associated with Internet porn use.

However, I hope he will take another look at Ogas and Gaddam's assumptions and analysis in light of the perils of today's Internet porn. Specifically, I hope he will reconsider whether A Billion Wicked Thoughts actually delivers what he suggests it does, namely, the "unvarnished truth of [our] sexual preferences and desires."

Karezza: Men Say Best Sex Comes Without Orgasm

Marnia's picture
Submitted by Marnia on
ABC News did a feature on karezza, and the reporter interviewed a number of forum members.

Matt Cook hasn't had an orgasm in seven months, and he hopes never to intentionally have one again. The 51-year-old publisher from Virginia isn't celibate. Happily married for 25 years, Cook said his sex life is more exciting than ever and giving up the goal-oriented climax has improved every aspect of his life.

Cook, the father of adult two sons, is a newcomer to karezza, a form of intercourse that emphasizes affection while staying far from the edge of orgasm. Climax is not the goal and ideally does not occur while making love.

Women: Does Orgasm Give You A Hangover?

Medusa, with live snakes for hairResearch reveals lingering postcoital cycle in women

In 2011, UK researchers released an interesting survey of postcoital symptoms in women. It didn't fit the standard script about how sex and orgasms transform women into glowing, satisfied beings or eager, contented lovers. Researchers noted,

Despite a wealth of evidence from specific internet sites and forums suggesting that irritability, crying and mood swings after sex seem to be common in females and males, to date no scientific study has tried to explore the nature of the phenomenon. ... Reports from female sufferers describing their condition suggest that [postcoital symptoms] can occur after sexual intercourse, both with and without orgasm.

The Wages of Sexual-Addiction Politics

Did addiction politics leave us stranded on a slippery slope?

Time for a radical rethink

Ever wonder why the brains of pathological gamblers, food addicts and video-game addicts have been studied, yet no one has studied the brains of porn addicts? We've certainly wondered—especially as one often hears the claim that the absence of studies is "proof" that porn addiction/sex addiction is a myth (even though clients and patients are increasingly complaining of being hooked on both).

Recently, we learned why brain-science research on porn and sex addiction is practically nonexistent.